You Know You’re Obsessing Over Football and Your Team When…(Raiders Style)

1. You’re a hedge fund manager but all you think about when you see Facebook’s (FB) ticker symbol is which fullbacks might be available in free agency.

2. You’re a highway patrolman and pull a guy over for speeding and let him off with a warning for going 130 because he says he was just "trying to get in Clowney’s head." You briefly debate whether he’ll be there at #5.

3. If you spent half the time you spend reading and researching everything about the Raiders and how to improve the roster by doing something work related you could have obtained your PhD, easily and adequately explained black holes to Cal Poly quantum physics instructors, and cured cancer…in one season.

4. When anything remotely related to the Raiders happens your smart phone blows up with texts because your friends "know you already know" what the real story is.

5. Your spouse knows the real reason you called in sick on Tuesday in late December was to catch the Bassett Furniture Bowl because you heard of a free safety who might be BPA in the sixth round.

6. Your spouse can recite your latest mock draft and knows perfectly well that you have reservations about Anthony Barr because he has only been playing linebacker for two seasons but you like his "upside".

7. You see the Raider shield in clouds, in sand, in every other logo that remotely resembles the Raider shield.

8. Truly believe the only legit team logo that should be in a car’s rear window is the Raider shield. All others look lame. You’d be 100% correct. In your mind.

9. You have recurring nightmares about screen passes and wake up in a cold sweat.

10. Every celebrity that you discover is a Raider fan immediately gets a "pass" for all his or her movie roles. "Jane Fonda was excellent in Barbarella!"

11. While traveling across the country over the holidays with your family, you see a guy in the Houston airport innocently sporting a Denver Broncos jersey and your spouse knows it could "go down like the Bloods and Crips in Compton" if your connecting flight is delayed any longer.

12. Daydream while driving about running cars off the road that sport 49ers flags from their windows.

13. Your spouse reminds you that she told you, while the Raiders game was on, that her parents are coming to stay for a month. You were blissfully unaware…until now.

14. Your spouse describes you to anyone that will listen as being "in the bubble" while the Raiders game is on.

15. Could and would argue to the death about BPA versus "Need" but couldn’t confidently find Syria on a map.

16. Fantasize that when the Raiders call you to renew your season tickets they’re actually calling to offer you a salaried position with the team.

17. Write silly lists like this one for S&B Pride when you should be writing that proposal, you know, for work, and to make actual money…!

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