Before we begin I’d just like to say in the immortal words of Eric Cartman, “screw you guys, I’m going home.” I’m currently in last place for the S&BP Roundtable: Mock Draft Edition article (Vote here). Without question, between the four of us, I drafted better than Cyril, BD, and Evan. It defies logic that I’m in last place. I demand to be referred to as Baby Mayock moving forward. Now, imagine me walking off giving you all the double fingered salute.

Because some of you don’t understand satire, I have to tell you the above paragraph was satire. However, you should go look and vote for who you believed had the best mock out of the four of us.

Raiders News

Total Pro Sports: Antonio Brown Says He’s Talking To Jon Gruden About A Potential Return to the Raiders

I don’t believe this because it’s coming from AB, but unfortunately I don’t think it’s out of character for Gruden to give AB another chance. I’m personally good, but I don’t pay the bills.

Fan Duel: 3 Trade Destinations for Nick Foles if Jaguars Stick With Gardner Minshew

I understand that news is slow, but why would the Raiders take on Foles’ salary? Sometimes it’s ok to take the extra ten to 15 minutes to do some research and use some common sense.

Titan Sized: ESPN Analyst explains how Derek Carr could end up as Titans backup QB

From the starter to the backup on another team? I just don’t see it happening. I hope Carr is using the news cycle this off season as motivation because boy, everyone is completely dismissing him. I don’t remember the last time I saw an article from a non-Raiders website that didn’t describe him as average or below average.

AFC West News

Arrowhead Pride: Colorado to “reach out” to Chiefs offensive coordinator Eric Bieniemy

Bieniemy’s alma mater plans to talk to him about its vacant head coaching position. It’s still a real shame that he’s not an NFL head coach, but if this a move that makes the Chiefs weaker I’m all for it.

Bolts From The Blue: GM Tom Telesco: “I like our internal options.”

Translation, #TankForTrevor

Mile High Report: The tight end could be a big deal in Shurmur’s offense

And Paul Guenther is sitting somewhere working on his PowerPoint on Windows 98, practicing how he’s going to convince Gruden and Mayock that Sean Lee is the answer to the Raiders’ linebacker woes.

NFL News

NBC Sports: Jameis Winston undergoes LASIK surgery to repair vision

There’s so many jokes and so little time, but maybe this was the problem all along? I kind of find it hard to believe that it took him five seasons to fix this issue, cause the man’s been squinting since college.

Fansided: Why does anybody think Taysom Hill is so good?

I’m asking myself the same question. I don’t get it.

CBS Sports: No one within the Steelers’ organization is ‘rooting’ for Ben Roethlisberger to retire, per report

I wouldn’t either if Mason Rudolph and a grown man who willingly goes by the name Duck were the only options available.

Dawgs By Nature: Myles Garrett reinstated by the NFL

I still don’t see what the big deal was in the first place. It’s not like their suspending players for full seasons for sexually assaulting Uber drivers, domestic violence, and a vast list of other actual you know, crimes. I will not remember Roger Goodell fondly, that’s for sure.